We know it is a messy affair. Long-distance relationships are never a preferred manner of being with someone. But what if we said there were some benefits of being in one? It is understandable to find that difficult to process.
After all, living through a long-distance relationship is a challenging task, let alone thinking of the positive in it.
But that is indeed the case. The test of any relationship is the resilience it portrays under challenging times. And what can be more complex than a long-distance relationship?
The benefits of a long-distance relationship.
Long-distance relationships provide unique perspectives to the partners who otherwise would not have been available. Let us look at these advantages arising out of a long-distance relationship.
You do not misinterpret infatuation for something more
Love is not a very easy emotion to interpret. It is very difficult to know if you are truly in love with someone or if it is a passing obsession.
People make a mistake both ways all the time. Plenty of people confuse the lust and passion they have for a partner to be loved. They eventually realize that they were all concerned with physical attractiveness and the following act.
Many relationships get started on the wrong foot and end in disasters. Similarly, people sometimes fall in love with others with whom they only want a physical relationship. Unknown to either of them, these feelings emerge, and emotional turmoil ensues.
- Nothing in long-distance relations happens in a spur: Long-distance relationships are perfect for making the partners involved in it conscious. Nothing happens on the spur of the moment. You have so much time and space between you and your partner that you are forced to think of what the relationship means to you.
- Keeps the confusion at bay: Long-distance relationships, therefore, keep all the confusion at bay. If you are in a relationship purely for carnal reasons, there is no way you will entertain someone whom you might only meet once a year. Long-distance relationships demand a lot of commitment from both sides. You are only in it if you care.
You learn so much more about your partner.
You would think you can learn more about a person when they are closer to you. But that is not always the case. Long-distance relationships can provide deep insights into your partner’s character. You may not talk to them as often as you would if you were together. You also see so much lesser of each other.
But when you get into a relationship, you realize that the quantity of interactions does not matter as much as the quality does. And the quality of conversations in a normal reaction is extremely average, to say the least.
You do not engage in difficult conversations with a person you are supposed to see daily. You never know which topics are out of bounds.
- Long-distance relationships improve the quality of interactions: But in a long-distance relationship, you are bound to speak on various issues. Since the two partners put so much effort into it, they deserve to know how the other person considers the relationship. Since their duration of interaction is limited, they try to make the most of it and embark on engaging in tough talks.
- Difficult talks are vital: It is not just that long-distance relationships provide greater opportunity for important talks but also show the importance of those talks. When you are committed to a person miles away from you, both of you deserve to know about the relationship’s future. These conversations are extremely beneficial to a relationship.
You can check out the faith in the relationship.
Long-distance relationships are especially difficult from the trust point of view. You are almost trusting your partner blindly.
You believe they are where they claim to be, that they are only acquaintances with that beautiful colleague in their photos etc. You must convince yourself that your partner will be loyal to you. Now definitely, this is not a one-way street.
Your partner would also have similar feelings, and they would have to work through those. The development of trust is a long, arduous process. And it carries way more heft when it is in a long-distance relationship.
Your partner would most probably not cheat on you when you stay together. But if they do not cheat on you when you are apart, you have a keeper.
- It is not just insecurities that are covered: Insecurities are taken care of in a successful long-distance relationship. But that is not all. You learn to let go of jealousy, or at least live with it. You would come across many couples having the time of their lives while you and your partner wallow in the distance. Jealousy is bound to arise.
- In effect, we become better people: But we learn that being jealous or insecure does not aid our relationship in any way. Letting go of those feelings and being grateful for your relationship makes you happier. These qualities seep into other facets of your life, making you a generous and confident person.
Diplomatic conflict resolution has become a forte.
It is imperative that when you enter a long-distance relationship, you should also be prepared for some serious conflicts. There are innumerable avenues for conflicts to arise when the partners are separated.
The minutest communication gap to gross misunderstandings can cause problems. But unlike a normal relationship, long-distance ones can be extremely difficult to solve.
The primary reason conflicts in long-distance relationships are so difficult to solve is the ease with which we can cut off all communication. The easiest and most immature way of dealing with conflicts is not to talk about them. And this is so easily possible in a long-distance relationship.
- Talking it out: Couples in a serious relationship choose to discuss the problems. When you are willing to spend your time and effort in getting over a call with your partner on the other side of the world, you are showcasing your commitment to the relationship and maturity in ending conflicts.
- This quality holds the relationship in good stead: When couples learn to solve problems by engaging with each other, they are also making themselves capable of overcoming future issues. A couple that can talk through their issues would more often than not stay together through their troubles. A long-distance relationship teaches you the hard way how to do it.
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You realize the worth of the moments spent together.
Most normal relationships become monotonous. You live with your partner, eat with them, go out with them, and become a part of their daily lives.
Soon you start taking their presence for granted. Complacency creeps in. You fail to appreciate the time you have with them. But that never happens in a long-distance relationship. You might meet once or twice a year.
And you try to ensure to make each moment matter during those meetings. You would hate to be separated from them when they visit you. And if you get those unplanned surprise visits, your pain and troubles of being apart are worth it.
- You value time more than anything else: When you are in a long-distance relationship, you may be extremely successful in your profession or topping your class, but real happiness comes from spending time with your loved ones. You start appreciating the value of time and understand how fickle and fast-moving time is. You wish to have nothing more than more time to be with your partner.
- You learn about the important things in life: Partners in a long-distance relationship learn about the simple forms of joy. The joy of seeing your partner for the first time in months when they come out of the airport terminal or the comfort of hugging them after days. You learn of the deepest sorrows when they leave and live with yourself when they are gone.
You generate a plethora of memorable moments.
All relationships have moments that define them. It is a very important requirement of any relationship that there should be moments that are etched in the memory of both individuals.
Sans those memories, they have nothing to look back at and know how much the relationship meant for them. In a normal relationship, memories are created. You have your anniversaries and birthdays and road trips.
But they are nothing compared to the ones you can create in a long-distance relationship. Long-distance relationships are a treasure trove for memories.
Every single moment that you get to spend together is a moment worth remembering. The once-a-year visits, the few and far apart anniversaries that you spend together, everything etches into the memories.
- You live the good old days: There is a very famous sitcom in which a character says that it would be wonderful if you knew you were in the good old days when you were in it. This is so true in long-distance relationships. You know that every moment you spend together will be cherished when you guys end up together eventually.
- Every trip, you try to outdo the previous one: Every visit to your partner is so priceless that you strive to make it even better than the last one. You engage in the most insane activities, stay at the best hotels, and eat at the finest diners in the city. In the process, you create instances that will stay with you forever.
Patience becomes an innate quality in you.
If you are impatient, you will gradually but surely learn to become patient once you enter a serious long-distance relationship.
In a normal relationship, you might lose your temper when your partner gets late for the movie or dinner reservation. But when you are in a long-distance relationship, you learn to wait the entire day to talk to them for the briefest moment.
You learn to live with them not answering your calls or being late at replying to your texts. You tell yourself that you have no other option other than to wait. Without patience, long-distance relationships would not go the distance.
- You learn to value their time: Gradually, you learn that the entire relationship does not revolve around you. You cannot demand to be listened to by your partner always. They are in a different world and dealing with their problems. You have to value their time and wait for your turn.
- Patience goes a long way: Once partners in a long-distance relationship realize how important patience is, they start practicing it in their daily lives. Not just that, but even when they end up together, the couple deals with each other kindly and respectfully. These are the effects of the lessons learned in a long-distance relationship.
You learn there is so much more to life.
In a normal relationship, your partner forms the nucleus of your being. You guys visit places you enjoy together, eat food both of you like, and move around with mutual friends. And some people do not even realize how much their partners influence their likes and choices.
It would not be far-fetched to say that you might lose a shred of your individuality. But when you are in a long-distance relationship, you have ample opportunities to explore the world and, more importantly, yourself. You come to terms with the fact that most of the preferences you thought were yours belonged to your partner.
- Meet new people, do new things: You are no longer duty-bound to consider another person’s likes and dislikes. You can choose to make new friends. You can choose to have new experiences, learn a new skill, or practice a new hobby; the possibilities are endless. And since you are separated from your partner, you will need to keep yourself engaged in these newfound activities.
- Enhance your individuality: It is always important to be individualistic. Strive to do the things you love to do always. Being in a relationship should never be a barrier to that. A long-distance relationship serves that purpose effectively. You learn so much more about yourself that you would be amazed at the person you have become.
Become responsible for your life.
There is always a tendency to depend on your partner in a relationship. Now dependencies can be of multiple kinds. It could be financial, physical, emotional, intellectual, etc. Depending on your partner is not a fault. People fall in love with people on whom they can depend.
But becoming dependent is a problem. Your partner earns more, so they pay the bills, are stronger, do the physical tasks, are more intelligent, and help you in your exams. These dependencies might render you inadequate in taking care of yourself.
- Stand up for yourself: In a long-distance relationship, it is incumbent upon you that you look out for yourself. You will be forced to meet your financial, emotional, and physical requirements on your own. This might seem scary initially, but eventually, you enjoy the freedom of it all and realize how wholesome you feel now that you have taken charge of your life.
- Self-growth becomes palpable: People say that they have grown over time. But when you are thrown at the deep end of it all, you develop into a more responsible person. You become adept at tackling the hurdles in life and overcoming them with ease and poise.
You make tough decisions for the future.
It is easy to tag along with your partner in a normal relationship. But not so much when in a long-distance relationship. The amount of effort that long-distance relationships demand is enormous. Wasting resources on a relationship that may or may not materialize into something more is a waste.
Both the partners would know this, so they will only enter into it if they are sure it is the right thing to do. They should talk about and make it clear how they see themselves and the relationship in the future.
- It is a commitment: A long-distance relationship in itself is a commitment. There are breakups in a long-distance relationship, but that does not mean it is to be taken lightly. Couples should decide on which cities to move to together and how they see their respective futures charting out.
- It is not for the fickle ones: Suffice, long-distance relationships are not for couples on an again-off-again spree. It requires maturity, the strength of character, and reliability. Both partners should be willing to make an effort required to make it work no matter what. It is only then that it becomes worth the trouble.
Long-distance relationships are interspersed with problems. It is very easy to see only the problems and miss out on its advantages of it. But let us tell you, there are many. These points mentioned are some of the many benefits of being in a long-distance relationship.
If the partners in the relationship understand each other and care for each other selflessly, then all these qualities of a long-distance relationship can be enjoyed. After all, any relationship that keeps the people involved in it happy is worth working on.
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships