We all hear about things to do and not do in a relationship, right? Well, in most cases, some statements are facts, and others are myths. Approaching a relationship based on relationship myths is a foolish thought. Here are some of the most common relationship myths we get to hear.
There’s one perfect person for all of us.
This is probably the most confusing relationship myth you’ll come across. You can fall in love with more than one person, and you can have multiple soulmates. Believing that there is one person in this world who is meant to be the love of your life will just disappoint you.
Walk out when you doubt something.
Common relationship rules suggest we end a relationship as soon as we find something doubtful about our partner. But actually, this is just a sign of impatience. You have to be strong enough to fight for your relationship by discussing your problems unless it has reached a very serious stage.
Think hard before getting married.
Marriage is the ultimate proclamation of your love for each other. You must be sure of your feelings and expectations from this relationship before getting married, but you cannot chalk everything out. If you try to map out everything to do, you won’t be able to enjoy spontaneity and vulnerability.
Always feel the spark.
We always try to keep the spark in our relationship alive. Whenever we find that spark missing, we think something’s wrong. But if you think practically, you may not always feel the spark. If your relationship isn’t constantly going through interesting phases, that doesn’t mean you don’t love your partner.
You must always have a happening sex life.
Sex is important, but you cannot base your relationship dynamics on your sex life. If you are not having lots of sex, that shouldn’t be a matter of concern if you have strong emotional intimacy. Only when your souls are connected can your bodies understand and accept each other well.
If you are fighting, it is a bad sign.
Realize that conflict is a healthy part of all relationships as long as partners are respectful and considerate. Blame games and mind games are never acceptable, but if you are fighting, it isn’t a bad sign; you just need to have the wisdom and patience to handle such complicated situations.
Play hard to attract your partner.
We play hard to get because we think it’s the best approach to attract someone. But try to understand that direct communication is the best way to let someone know that you like them. It helps you avoid uncomfortable and complicated situations because you already know they are emotionally available.
Achieve milestones at a specific time.
We often approach our relationships too methodically by setting timelines for when we should achieve our relationship goals. If you think deeply, things will never go according to your plan, and you can’t always assume everything. So, the correct approach is to go with the flow and let things happen naturally.
You are responsible for fulfilling each other’s needs.
Society demands we be in a codependent relationship where our partner is bound to fulfill all our needs and expectations, both materially and emotionally. This is never possible because nobody is responsible for our happiness, and one person cannot take care of all our needs. This just makes things complicated.
You complete each other.
This relationship myth is not just unacceptable; it hurts our self-esteem. True happiness comes from within, and we are capable enough to make ourselves happy. A relationship is an important part of our life, but we are not incomplete without it. So, if you are single, don’t stress yourself out.
Your feelings for the right one will never change.
Our emotions are never constant; they change with time. So, no matter what kind of relationship you are in. This relationship myth is patently false because if you want to keep working out forever, you have to prioritize commitment and understanding; you have to stay dedicated and make honest efforts.
Getting married and having babies solve relationship issues.
Every relationship goes through challenging times. But having a baby or getting married will not solve your problems. You cannot make such a major life decision without thinking wisely. Don’t take a serious step unless you are really ready. Try solving your relationship issues through open communication with your partner.
You feel loved the way everyone does.
This is not even a relationship myth, and it’s a lie. We all perceive and accept love and affection in different ways. So, it’s impossible that one emotion will be accepted by everyone with equal intensity. Stop comparing your relationship with other people and try to understand your partner’s love language.
Once a cheater, always a cheater.
This is just an assumption. Every person can change under the right influence. So, you should never think that if your partner has cheated on you or someone else, they will do it again. You must always look out for the red flags but don’t focus on the negatives only.
You love only once.
They say no relationship can match the purity and essence of your first relationship because you only love once. Why ignore the possibility that someone else can love us even more than our first partner? Never be afraid to fall in love, and don’t get stuck in your first relationship.
You have to make a grand proposal.
People believing in this relationship obviously haven’t heard about ‘minimal is the best. You don’t always have to make a grand proposal and spend tons of money to show your partner how much you love them. Even a small, intimate arrangement will make them happy if your feelings are genuine.
It’s a ring only when it has a big diamond in it.
We always try to go the extra mile to make our partners feel special. But you don’t need to put too much pressure on yourself to buy a big diamond ring when you decide to propose to them. The size of the diamond doesn’t decide how much you love them.
You should be in an easygoing relationship.
How can you expect to be in a relationship with only ups and no downs? It’s impossible to avoid disagreements with your partner, no matter how understanding he is, because we are different. Fighting with your partner is not the important thing; what matters is how you deal with it.
Ways to make your relationship easygoing:
- Believe in the element of surprise.
- Send each other romantic messages when not together.
- Plan frequent date nights, no matter how busy you are.
- Express your feelings in words, don’t wait for them to feel or understand them.
- Do more fun and creative things together.
- Plan double dates with other friends.
- Set goals to achieve together.
- Discuss your passion and aspirations in life.
- Ask each other impactful and helpful questions.
- Always be excited to see and be with each other.
You should always feel the urge to be together.
If you believe in this relationship, it just makes you look needy and desperate. If your entire life circles around your relationship, how will you focus on the other important aspects? If you are away from your partner because of a work commitment, does that mean you don’t love them?
You have to act on your attraction.
If you are merely attracted to someone, you can’t act on it instinctively. If this attraction makes you cheat on your partner or flirt endlessly with that person enough to make them feel uncomfortable, you are wrong. You might like someone; you don’t always have to do something about it.
The woman is responsible for keeping birth control in mind.
Modern-day men must realize that birth control is a two-way thing. You cannot dump the entire responsibility on the woman. If sex involves two people, so does the responsibility to avoid getting pregnant. Men should be brave enough to address this issue directly. This is another attractive form of chivalry.
Never go to bed angry.
Believe it or not, this is a relationship myth. If you think practically, you might not always find an instant solution to your problems. Just leaving the topic, going to bed, and getting some sleep will calm your mind, and you can always talk about your issues the next day.
This is the most common relation myth you will come across. Your soulmate might be someone who is a lot similar to you when it comes to personality and preferences. So, don’t always go looking for opposite qualities in someone to decide if they are meant to be your soulmate.
Jealousy expresses love.
We often think our partner’s jealousy and possessiveness are expressions of their love. In a healthy relationship, your partner will never be jealous of you if they know you well. Possessiveness starts getting harmful when they start mistrusting you and snooping around you, having no respect for your private space.
Ways in which jealousy is healthy in your relationship:
- Someone is casually flirting with your partner at a party.
- Your partner is flirting harmlessly with a friend.
- Your partner is boasting about their success when you are in a bad place.
- Your partner succeeded in something, and you didn’t.
- Someone says something about your partner that you didn’t already know.
- Your partner has a sort of relationship with someone else.
- Your partner goes on a trip they shouldn’t have.
- Your partner is overly-attentive towards their friends or colleagues.
- Your partner mentions someone and says how they are much better than you.
- Your partner doesn’t appreciate you enough.
There are no secrets between partners.
Who says that? There are things that you would never want to tell anyone, not even your partner, no matter how close they are to you. In a healthy relationship, you can have secrets, and your partner must respect your private boundaries. They cannot keep pestering you to reveal them.
Marriage is a partnership.
We all expect couples getting married to share their responsibilities equally. But if you look practically, this balance can never be maintained. Often, one partner takes care of more things in a marriage than the other one, for example, when your partner is going through a financial or emotional crisis.
You don’t need anyone else when you have a good relationship.
If you believe in this relationship myth, it will isolate you from other priorities. Your life will only revolve around this relationship and your partner, and you will grow distant from your family and friends. Often, a good friend can provide you with emotional security that even your partner can’t.
You rarely find a good relationship.
Not necessarily. Maybe most of your relationships are good if you look positively at them. Every person is different, so our relationship equations are different. You will create good memories with each partner, and when you look back, everyone teaches you something valuable. So, good, healthy relationships aren’t that rare.
Monogamy is essential.
People get involved with multiple people at the same time. It’s not wrong to have feelings for more than one person. In that case, monogamy is a lost cause. As long as you aren’t hurting someone intentionally or ruining their mental health, you may not be in a monogamous relationship.
You must have a fairy tale love story.
Relationships are bound to be complex, and you don’t always get to live out a fairy tale. If you get into a relationship thinking that everything will be lovey-dovey all the time, you will hurt your expectations. You have to make an effort if you want your relationship to work out.
You must have heard of most of these relationship myths and probably, believed in them too. Although it’s’ for you to decide what’s best for your relationship, it’s time to bust these myths because they stop you from approaching your relationship practically. Think before you act and make decisions wisely.
Some hard truths about relationships:
- You won’t like your partner all the time.
- Something they do might irritate or upset you.
- You may not miss your partner when they are away from you.
- You might feel bored in this relationship.
- You might feel lonely even in their presence.
- Your partner is different from you, and this will lead to uncomfortable situations.
- You might not always have a satisfying sex life.
- You may have doubts about the love and connection in your relationship.
- You will somehow hurt each other.
- You may not want to get married.
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Hey! I’m Chris Woods . I’m a 38-Year-Old Personal Trainer Who Enjoys Eating Out, Watching Television, and Worshiping. I Have a Degree in Psychology. I’m Physical in Pretty Good Shape. My Average Height with Glowing Skin, Black Hair, and Light Grey Eyes. I Love to Write About Love & Relationships. So, That’s Why I Created This Blog to Share My Knowledge with You.