Of all the dreaded things in a person’s dating life, being friend-zoned by your crush is the worst. Your life will be messy if you are truly obsessed and in love with that person. People also face a lot of mental health issues like depression and anxiety.
If you truly want to turn the tables, you need to make sure that you change yourself in your partner’s eyes so that they start seeing you as more than a friend.
Tips on how to leave the friend zone
Admit Being In The Friend Zone. You need to accept the fact that you have landed in the friend zone. Unless you have a reality check, your imagination will drive you wild and make you think that there is a chance and something will magically happen which will bring you and your crush together.
Paint A Picture Of How Your Friend Sees You. When trying to woo someone, you need to understand what they think of you. You need to know what you are doing to turn them off.
Break The Pattern. If you have been doing the same old things, spice things up. Go to new places and do things together that will make you and your partner feel more connected to each other.
Try And Confess Your Feelings. If you haven’t made a move yet or have not shown any romantic interest, your crush may be unaware of your feelings and are treating you as a friend. Take the first step.
Don’t Do Everything For Them. In many cases of being friend-zoned, the person in demand has more power and will make the chaser do many things for them. Don’t be that person who does not have self-respect and would do anything for them.
Shift The Power Balance. Everything in your life typically seems to be in their favor. They have more control over the dynamic you two are in, and you need to change it. Don’t let them be dominant. Instead, shift the balance in your favor.
Stop Responding. If you are always available and seem to respond to your crush’s texts and calls almost immediately, give it a break. Know that it is not worth it. Value yourself over anything else.
Maintain Distance. In line with the above point, you need to maintain a distance. You need to let them know that you have your own life and value yourself enough to walk away from a situation that doesn’t give you the respect that you deserve.
Level Up Your Looks And Appearance. We, as humans, tend to be attracted to faces more than hearts or minds. Figure out how you can change the way you look. Do anything that makes you look edgy and will make you feel confident about yourself.
Try And Make Other Friends Of The Opposite Gender. When stuck on someone who has friend-zoned you, you treat them as a prized possession, and in turn, you stop yourself from having a good time. Go out and date other people. Make friends with the other gender. Your crush will surely notice this.
Make Them Jealous. You need to let them know that they are not the only person in your world and you have other friends too. Sometimes drop plans with them to hang out with other people and make sure that they know of this. This will surely trigger them and make them land to ask questions.
Stop Being There All The Time. If you are indeed available all the time, cut the process. You are not liable to do anything for them, and remember that you aren’t really getting anything in return.
Have Pride And Self-Respect. When in the friend zone, chances are that you have lost all respect which is key to building a lasting relationship. If you don’t respect yourself, chances are they will not respect you either. You need to have your own set of ego and pride. Value yourself.
Get A Life. If you have been fixating on this particular person every day, it seems like you don’t really have a life. As they say, there is plenty of fish in the sea. Go out and have some fun. You will stop giving them the time and value that they don’t quite deserve.
Change Your Attitude. Know that they are human and have no god or goddess. You don’t need to put them on a pedestal. Maybe they’re attractive as hell, but remember that it’s not just about attraction.
Know That There Are Plenty Of Fish In The Sea. You need to understand that millions of people in the world will love you for who you are, and you won’t have to think of changing yourself to be with someone. You deserve love as much as anyone else in the world.
Cut Off Contact. You need to make a decision to cut them out of your life if they aren’t reciprocating your feelings, This will make you land in a much better place mentally, and they will also start missing you. “Distance makes the heart grow fonder.” It does.
Be Close To Their Other Friends. You can try and be close to your friends. This will make them understand that they are not as special and important as they thought they were.
Make A Move. If you have spent a considerable amount of time and things aren’t quite heading the right way, you need to decide to make a move. This way, you will have a clear understanding of where you are and what you need to do in order to better your life.
Have A Word With Your Crush. You need to let them know how you feel. It could be that they are shy and don’t really know if you feel the same way. In saying this, don’t get your hopes too high either.
Know Why You Got Friendzoned. Is It that you were too needy? Is it that you were too bored? You need to know what made you land in the friend zone in the first place.
Stop Being Frustrated. If you are frustrated and confused about what to do, stop taking things so seriously and take a step back. They’re just like any other human being out there. Stop obsessing over them.
Don’t Let Rejection Control Your Life. If you have been rejected, embrace it. Learn to live with failures as they will teach you and make you become and come out as a better and stronger human being.
Understand The Friend Zone. You need to understand the friend zone. It Is a place where your crush doesn’t hate you in any way; they do love you but as a friend. They just don’t feel enough for you romantically.
Don’t Put Yourself In The Friendzone. Sometimes, people put themselves in the friend-zone themselves with their actions. If you have been extremely friendly to keep things simple and playing it safe, chances are you have done the damage already. May they liked you, but your actions made them change their mind.
Stop Giving Them Your Time And Efforts. Save your efforts for someone who will really appreciate them and try to reciprocate in some way or another. Stop wasting your time and efforts on someone who won’t realize your worth.
Don’t Listen To Their Problems. Don’t be that person who always shares your shoulder to lean on when they are having a tough time. You may feel that they are relying on you, but to be honest, they are just using you as their support system.
Take A Step Back. If you going too fast and feel like you are in dire straits with the proceedings of this relationship, try and take a step back. Figure things out logically, and then think about what you need to do.
Kill Any Hatred Towards Yourself. Being in the friend zone will bring down your self-worth and confidence as a whole. In turn, you will start hating and questioning your own existence. NEVER do that.
Don’t Blame Yourself. If you blame yourself and are unhappy about yourself, know that it’s not your fault. You can control how someone else feels towards you. Things happen, and life’s real test lies in how you react to these things happening.
Start Dating. You need to restart and kickstart your dating life. Chances are you have spent way too much time on this one person and think life isn’t the same as them and blah blah. Start dating someone else, and you will soon start feeling a lot better.
Have An Amazing Social Media Profile. Do fun things and share social media. This will show them that your life is awesome, and chances are that they will want to be involved in it. Now you can be in a position of power and demand things your way.
Don’t Agree With Things They Say. If you have been agreeing way too much and putting up a façade, stop it. First, you aren’t yourself, and they will get too bored with you easily. You should agree to disagree.
Start Escalating Things Sexually. Try and break the touch barrier and bring intimacy. Don’t be scared to lose them. They are not truly yours now anyway. Sexuality brings emotional connection too.
When You Really Love Someone as A Friend, It Affects You when You Have to Lose Them. Here Are Some of Tips To Friendzone Someone Politely.
Bring About Sexual Tension. A good relationship needs sexual tension and chemistry. You need to build on that spice and heat things up a little between the two of you. Stop being boring.
Don’t Be Afraid Of Losing Them. You need to stop being afraid of losing them as if they are some God/Goddess. They aren’t yours to keep anyways. You’d rather have clarity in your life than stay hanging for the rest of your life. It will, anyway, end someday or the other.
Be Ready To Move On. You need to make the necessary changes in your life to feel happy once again and come out of the darkness in your life right now. You need to be ready to move on someday or the other. Better now than later.
Stop Making Compromises. If you’re making way too many sacrifices for them, stop doing that. Do not show your weakness. Chances are that they don’t quite value how you feel. If they did, they would have taken a step back and not led you on.
Redefine Yourself In Their Head. Reinvent yourself in their head. Do things that they never thought you would. They became too comfortable with you. So now you need to show that you too, are quite valuable.
Be Patient When Trying To Get Out. You haven’t landed here in a day. The way out of it will take some time too. You need to cut the wires that make you feel the way you feel. So you need to give the process the time it deserves.
Maintain Eye Contact. Try and maintain as much eye contact with your crush as possible. This is a science-backed way of igniting that spark between two people. Don’t be intimidating, though!
Initiate Touch. Know when to touch them. Don’t be overly aggressive while doing that, either, or you may come across as awkward and make them cringe.
Be Flirty. Flirting is the best way to ignite attraction. Everyone loves a little bit of teasing and pleasing, and they are no different. Compliment on how they look in a particular outfit or make some innuendos once in a while. Don’t overdo it, though.
Don’t Play Mind Games. The worst thing you can do is to try and manipulate them into liking you. It’s a waste of time, and you don’t want to be that person who does things just for their benefit. Don’t lose out on your values.
Be The Best Version Of Yourself. Try and be the best version of yourself when in front of your crush. You need to make them feel those butterflies inside their stomachs too. You need to build value.
Upgrade Yourself. Do things that will make you stand apart from the crowd. Learn a new skill or get a new job that will make you look really successful and valuable. Upgrade your life, and chances are that they will feel that they are losing out on not being with you.
Be Clear With Your Needs. You need to be honest about what you need from the relationship. They will never understand if you do not create the necessary parameters to make things work. Communication is key at any time in the relationship.
Don’t Be Needy. Being needy brings about dependency. This will also make them think twice before being with you. They will know that if you two are in a relationship, chances are that you will behave the same way, and they won’t have enough freedom to live their own life.
Do Not Chase Your Crush. Never chase them. That will push them further away. Chasing someone is a bad idea as it tells them that you don’t have enough self-esteem and want to fuel it through someone else.
Compliment Them. Compliment them from time to time. Not too much, though. A compliment once in a while will show them your romantic interest in them.
Don’t Try To Pursue Them All Day Long. If you think that they are a luxury commodity, you are wrong. No person wants to be with someone with who they can’t connect. Everyone wants someone who will be equal in their relationship.
Keep Yourself Occupied. If you are always thinking of them, you are living a half-life. Keep yourself occupied with things that excite you. Once you are passionate about something, you will automatically stop obsessing over them, making things healthy between you two.
Show Them That You Have A Life. You also need to show them that you don’t actually need them to have a happy life. Show them that you can live without them; although they are important, they don’t occupy the crux of your life.
Make Them Understand How Life Feels Without You. They also need to understand how life would be without you. People often fail to realize a person’s worth when they are always around. They need to know the things you do for them and value them.
Build Your Value. You need to build your value in their lives too. They will respect you for who you are. Otherwise, they will take you for granted and keep using your feelings.
Use Social Media To Show How Amazing Your Life Is. Once you cut off contact, post pictures on social media to show them how amazing your life is. Hang out with friends, have some drinks, and make friends of the opposite gender. But while you are at it, make sure you are really enjoying yourself.
Do Not Get Frustrated And Angry. When in the friend zone, don’t get frustrated and angry. Chances are you will be bitter all the time that way, and maybe you will push someone away who actually and truly loves you. Don’t be someone who loses things because of their actions and blames someone else later.
Take Care Of Yourself. You need to take care of yourself. When trying to get out of the friend zone, you will start feeling lovely and initially feel lost. You need to figure out ways to distract yourself during these times. Learning an instrument is a great remedy.
Talk To A Friend. You can seek help from a friend. Maybe they have been in a similar situation and can give you some insight on making things work out, and you will feel better when you know that you are not the only one feeling these feelings.
Embrace Rejection. If you are rejected, start appreciating it. Rejection teaches us a lot of things, and feels proud of how well we have handled rejection. You will come out as a stronger person. Also, being rejected by someone is not really a big deal.
Make Yourself Scarce. You need to make yourself have some importance. Since you have always been available so far, they will miss you when you are not. This can lead to attraction, and this has been a tried and tested method in many cases.
Be Less Interested In Their Lives. If you take ample participation in their lives, stop it. Be more interested in yourself and your own feelings. This will show them that you value yourself too, and you deserve love too.
You Friendzone Them. While they have been friend-zoning you, try to flip the switch and friend zone them. This will be a huge blow to them, and they will think things twice. Call them, bro, and talk to other friends and hotties of the opposite gender while they are around. See, the tables turn almost immediately.
Do The Opposite Things. Do the exact opposite things you have been doing so far. If you replied to their texts in a minute, reply after a day; if you were always there to hang out with them, cancel plans at the last moment and show them that you have gone somewhere else and are having fun with other people.
Show Them That You Have Changed. You need to show them that you are not that innocent little person you were before, and they simply can’t take you for granted. If they have to be with you, they will need to learn how to.
Stop Being Treated As A Doormat. If you have been played with, have some pride and stand up for yourself. Have dignity. They will also get a little shocked and mend their ways.
Become Busy. Becoming busy will also show them that you have a life and love it. They will try and make an effort to be a part of your life. If it is meant to be it will be.
Have Goals In Life. Focus more on your life and have goals that will motivate you to live better. This way, you will raise your standards. This time around, they will be the ones making an effort to be around you. Also, you will feel much better about yourself once you start achieving your goals. Chances are that in the process, you might find someone who will love you for who you are.
Move On. Know when it’s time to leave. You have done your part right. If they don’t understand, let go of them. Start loving your life. If things were meant to be, they would have been. Don’t harbor any hate or negative feelings – neither towards them nor towards yourself nor towards love. Learn from the experience and head out to face the real world. Things will be fine soon!
Letting go of someone you love is difficult and might seem next to impossible. If you know how to love, remember you will get love back. Everyone craves love, but very few people actually know how to love! Take care of yourself!
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships