A relationship can be divided into different bases which have been around for a very long time.
These bases are the building blocks of a relationship that should be followed by everyone. Traditionally, there are four intimate bases of love that are widely popular around the globe.
Here is everything you need to know about the 4 bases of love
These four bases define the process of how a relationship begins and two people become a couple. There are also several other bases of love that exist in the world. However, these four are the most fundamental ones that you will find everywhere.
It all starts with a desire to be with someone to whom you are attracted to. Soon, this desire becomes a reality as you begin talking with that person. As time flows by, you two get close and get into a relationship.
It’s the desire which makes you feel attracted to someone. It is a very powerful emotion that will make you do a lot of things. After all, who doesn’t want to have someone to love in their life.
Once you find that someone, you will go through the four basic bases of love in your relationship.
The first base of any love is lust. Lust is what makes you feel attracted to someone and is the first stage of a relationship. The attraction can be due to physical or any characteristics that you like.
If you are not attracted to someone, then you will never fall in love with them, let alone have sex with them.
- Lust is the fundamental part of romance that attracts you to someone who you find attractive. Every person has different types of lust and entirely depends on the personality of the person. If you do not feel attracted to someone, then the chances of a happy relationship are zero.
- You can think of lust as a driving force that will make you do things that you normally wouldn’t do. When you feel lust, you will experience a sort of tunnel vision where you will only think of the person you are attracted to and nothing else.
- As per research, a person who experiences lust is just the same as a person under drugs. So when you are experiencing lust, you won’t be able to think clearly and would just want to be with that person. This is why lust is the first base of a relationship and without it, a relationship cannot begin.
For some, physical attraction is enough to get their attention. But for some, it takes more than that as the person will also look for any character traits that make them feel compatible with that person.
The second most important base in the stages of intimacy is respect. Once you start seeing someone, you should respect them and know their personality.
You must respect the person if you want to be with them for the rest of your life.
- You must never force yourself or your opinion on that person as it can damage the relationship in an instant. You need to understand that this person also has their feelings and opinions which they want you to hear. But if you ignore them, then the relationship won’t last any longer.
- For a relationship to be healthy, you also need to set up some boundaries to see whether you two are compatible or not. If you do not feel comfortable with that person, then you should back out from the relationship and move on. There is no point in staying in a relationship where you do not feel anything for your partner.
- To make your relationship successful, you can start by listening more to your partner. Even if your partner doesn’t tell you something directly, you should always be alert to get hints or signals from your partner. It will help you understand if there is anything wrong with your relationship as early as possible.
- If your partner needs more time to process everything, you should respect their decision and give them the space they need. Don’t try to control them as it can damage your health relationship just like that.
Thus, the best option is to set some boundaries so that you two can start to know each other better first before you decide to start dating together.
Once you complete the second base of the relationship, it is now time to go for the third base.
After spending so much time together, you two are now comfortable with each other.
- Your partner now fully trusts you and can lower their guard around you. If this happens, then you can go for a kiss with your partner. It is like a dream come true where you have been waiting for so long for this moment to come. You are now ready to kiss your partner and take the next step in your relationship. However, before kissing your partner, you should get their consent first instead of trying to force it on them.
- If your partner is not yet ready to kiss you, then you should respect it and give them time. If you try to force them, then your relationship won’t last long and you will lose your partner because of your mistake. A kiss is very important for some people and they want it to be special. If your partner feels you are special to them, then they won’t mind kissing you.
A good kiss is just like a remedy that will cause your brain to fill with love and joy. You will experience the happiest day in your life and will always remember the day.
This is the fourth base of a relationship where it’s time to get intimate with your partner. As your relationship reaches the intimacy stage, you can start getting intimate with your partner and have sex.
You may have been waiting for this moment for a very long time. Now it’s time to do what you have been waiting for for so long.
- You can start with oral which is a great way to warm up and get in the mood. Some people don’t like oral and simply skip the step. But some love oral and enjoy every moment of it. Both of these are okay and it is not a compulsory process.
- The best way to handle things in this situation is to start a kind and mature conversation with your partner before moving on to the next steps. This way helps the two of you get comfortable as both of you need to stay normal.
- Don’t let joy take over you and control the situation as per your needs. Don’t push it and take it slow if possible. It is one of the best moments of your life and you want to have the best experience. So if you want it to be enjoyable and memorable, then you should be 100% happy with what’s going on.
- You should not be under any pressure as it affects your performance and you may even lose your confidence. So, try talking to your partner and make sure that you are comfortable with your partner.
- If you are getting undressed for the first time in front of someone, it can be quite awkward and you will feel really shy about it. But this is the moment to show confidence and not being controlled with nervousness.
Once you feel confident, you will feel much better and will be able to have the best pleasure possible. Just remember that there is nothing to be afraid of and it is completely normal.
How to proceed through each base?
After learning so much about the four bases of love, it is now time to apply the knowledge in real life. If you do it correctly, you can get from base 1 to base 4 successfully, given the fact that you play all your cards right.
If you truly want this to work, you will have to be patient, gentle and sensitive in your approach to get the best results.
Get to first base
The first is basically about attraction, be it physical or emotional. Either way, you need to make sure that you are attracted to the person and that person is also interested in you. Then you need to be honest with them and let them know that you are trustworthy.
As you spend more time with that person, they will open up to you and you will get closer to that person. You need to be gentle and patient to win over the person’s heart. If you manage to do this, then you will have reached first base.
Now all you need to do is be yourself and wait for the right moment to proceed to the next base. But if you try to force that person, then this base will likely be the end of your relationship.
Get to second base
To get to the second base, you need to understand that there is no shortcut and you will have to be genuine if you truly want to be with that person. The second base of love is respect which is very important in every relationship.
If there is no respect, then there is no point in staying in that relationship. So you need to make sure that you treat that person with respect and never force your opinion on them. This way you will be able to win over that person’s heart.
As you continue doing so, you will have earned the trust of your partner and you will easily get to the second base of love. Remember that not every person manages to reach the second base as they fail to understand the basic importance of the base.
If you don’t show respect to someone, they will most likely move on and you won’t be able to get past second base. So, be genuine and have faith in your partner. As time passes, both of you will begin to trust each other.
Get to third base
The third base is where things get real and you begin to experience the true importance of a relationship. Once you reach this base, you can kiss your partner. After you clear the second base of love, you two will now get close and begin to understand each other’s feelings. Both of you will experience true love and get cozier.
But if you are looking for a casual hook-up, then you need to take your time and prepare yourself. Once you get to third base, things will get more intense as you will get closer to your partner.
If you are not sure about this base, then you can take your time and understand how things work.
Once you are done exploring the second base, you can talk to your partner about whether they are ready to get the third base. If the answer is yes, then you can get to this base and begin exploring new things of pleasure.
Get to fourth base
The fourth base is where things get real and you get to have sex with your partner. This is a very intense experience and first-timers can have a lot of difficulty in this base.
If you feel you are not yet ready for this stage, then you can take your time in third base and get the hang of it.
Once you feel more comfortable, you can then safely proceed to the next base. You also need to make sure that you take the proper consent of your partner before trying anything. You two need to be on the same path if you want things to go smoothly.
If you try to force your partner to get to the fourth base, then it will mean the end of your relationship. Thus, do not exert pressure on your partner and give them their space to figure things out. Both of you need to be ready for the fourth base to work things out.
You have full control of the pace and use it to make sure that your partner is also prepared for this base.
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships