You might feel at some point in your relationship that you don’t have a strong foundation of trust any more. Before things get out of hand, work on rebuilding trust. Both partners have to make an effort to restore balance, and here are some smart ways you can do it efficiently.
Respect your partner’s physical boundaries.
Even when you’ve been in a relationship with your partner for a long time, always be mindful of their boundaries when it comes to touch. Try to make them as comfortable as possible so that they can know you will never cross your limits and they can trust you wholeheartedly.
Sit together and gaze at each other.
This simple exercise is extremely helpful if you want to build empathy and reconnect with your partner. Simply gaze at each other in silence for 3-5 minutes. Eye contact triggers your brain so that you can understand your partner’s emotions much better, knowing if you truly love and trust them.
Do some mindful breathing now and then.
Another great way to release tension in your relationship is to practice mindful breathing. Find yourself a comfortable place, sit across from each other, play soothing music, and just calm your body and mind. After some time, your breathing will become synchronized, and you are subconsciously reconnecting with each other.
Write notes of gratitude to each other.
Before you rebuild trust in your relationship, you must genuinely feel grateful. Write sweet gratitude notes and express your feelings. Be honest with what you are writing and tell each other how lucky you feel to be a part of this relationship and have each other’s constant support and adoration.
Trivial things to be grateful for every day:
- To be able to sit with a cup of warm coffee and a good book.
- Ordering food from your favorite restaurant and enjoying a meal alone.
- The scent of your mom’s freshly baked cookies or chocolate cake.
- To be able to connect with the outer world through a cell phone.
- To be able to afford to live under a roof and have all amenities.
- To have kind and loving friends who get you.
- To be able to share a good laugh with your loved ones.
- To receive good news about a friend’s success.
- To be able to watch the beautiful sunrise and sunset every day.
- To be able to sleep peacefully at night.
Play blindfolded games.
This sounds stupid, but it actually works. Play a game where you blindfold your partner, and the only way they win is if they can trust you completely. This shows how much you understand and trust each other and if you don’t feel adequate, keep playing until you get comfortable.
Reveal a secret to each other.
To rebuild trust, reveal one of your deepest secrets to your partner and make them do the same. When you are comfortable enough to share something with them that is very personal to you, you know you can trust them in this relationship. This obviously works when done both ways.
Be transparent about your electronic devices.
Yes, phones and laptops are very private, and you might not want to share your passwords with your partner. But try to maintain a level of transparency where you don’t make each other feel suspicious, as if there’s something on your phone that you don’t want them to find out.
Schedule regular date nights.
If you want to rebuild trust, you have to spend more quality time together. Therefore, prioritize having more frequent date nights where you can just be there for each other. Getting to know each other is very important if you think there is a lack of trust in your connection.
Select a common hobby.
Stepping out of your comfort zone is very important if you want your partner to trust you. So, choose a hobby they are fond of and join them, even if you are not a fan. They will trust you when they see that you are not afraid of taking risks.
Prepare yourself to never breach trust.
Learn from what caused this lack of trust in your relationship and see how it can stop it from happening in the future. Set expectations for yourself and your partner so that you can avoid uncomfortable situations in the future. Make a plan and be determined enough to stay committed.
Discuss the issue that has been bothering you.
If you avoid the topic of what caused mistrust in your relationship, it’s going to stay there forever. Rather than unnecessarily beating around the bush, discuss the matter directly with your partner. Don’t get into ugly fights; just calmly talk about it, figure out a permanent solution and restore trust.
Apologize and accept their apologies.
If you are one who’s messed up, don’t hold on to your ego and apologize for your mistake. Also, if your partner made a mistake leading to a lack of trust in your relationship and is genuinely repentant, accept their apology. Holding on to the issue forever will not help.
Prioritize your commitments.
If your partner has trusted you with something important and you are negligent about it, that may lead to mistrust in your relationship. So, be determined enough to stick to your commitments, no matter what. You must always be able to trust each other with everything in a healthy relationship.
Never play the blame game.
The problem of mistrust becomes prominent in a relationship when partners start blaming each other for the issue rather than trying to find a solution. If you want to rebuild trust, change your mindset; prioritize teamwork and compassion rather than playing the blame game and dumping everything on your partner.
Go for couples therapy.
Often, rebuilding trust in a relationship can become very difficult for partners. In that case, before things get worse, go to a professional couples’ therapist and discuss your issue. They might be able to help you cope with your problem better and find out ways you can save this relationship.
Reasons to go for couples’ counseling:
- You think you don’t have effective communication in your relationship.
- You think you need to strengthen your emotional bonding.
- You think you need to work on your sex life.
- You think you have trouble dealing with uncomfortable situations.
- You think you lack enough trust and understanding with your partner.
- You think you need guidance to have an ever-lasting and happy marriage.
- You think you need guidance before becoming parents.
- You think you don’t support each other properly through tough situations.
- You don’t want to have an unhealthy marriage in the future.
- You want to improve your work-life balance.
Practical, effective communication.
You cannot sort out your problems if you don’t have effective communication in your relationship. Before you start rebuilding trust, you must find out the root cause of this growing mistrust and misunderstanding in your relationship, and that cannot happen unless you have clear and direct communication with your partner.
Don’t keep secrets from your partner.
Yes, you have private space, but mistrust arises when you have too many secrets in a relationship. If you cannot trust your partner or you feel they would judge or criticize you, you have to be more flexible as an individual and as a partner in this relationship.
Practice saying no to your partner.
If you always listen to your partner’s demands, even when you know that they are being unreasonable, this might lead to mistrust in your relationship. Learn to say no, and make it clear that you will not agree to any immoral or non-negotiable requests, even if it’s from your partner.
Maintain your boundaries and respect each other.
If you are always overstepping your partner’s boundaries or letting them do the same, there is no way you can work on rebuilding trust in this relationship. Set your own boundaries and respect your partner’s boundaries as well. With mutual respect and understanding comes trust and reliability in a relationship.
Don’t break your promises.
When you promise something to your partner, try to fulfill it with commitment and honor. A promise is the biggest sign that you want someone to trust you wholeheartedly. Learning to stay committed to your responsibility as a partner in a relationship is the most important thing to do.
Always follow a no-cheating policy.
You can never rebuild trust if the root cause of it is cheating. If you are attracted to someone else or don’t want to be in this relationship, clarify it to your partner and end it, if needed. But breaking commitments is the worst way you could hurt your partner.
Take responsibility for your mistakes.
Be brave enough to own up to your mistakes and bad decisions- whatever it is. Playing the blame games or cursing the circumstances just worsens your situation. If you can give your partner a heartfelt apology, they know you are eager to work on this relationship and make things better.
Just be there for your partner.
Probably the simplest way to rebuild trust in your relationship is to let your partner feel your constant presence and motivation. This lack of trust might arise from them feeling you are not committed and responsible enough. Just be constantly engaged with their lives and help them overcome their insecurities.
Respond to what your partner wants.
If your partner thinks something’s wrong with your mutual understanding, take them seriously. Hear them out and see what changes they want to rebuild trust and love in this relationship. A part of working on your problems is to let your partner know that you prioritize their needs over yours.
Build a strong foundation based on honesty.
Rebuilding trust means you have to get more honest with your partner. Don’t lie unnecessarily or out of this fear that they will not understand you or judge you. When your partner knows that you are honest with them, no matter what, they will feel free to trust you wholeheartedly.
Give each other the benefit of the doubt.
Doubts are the root cause of all problems in a relationship. So, before you start judging your partner or jumping to conclusions, try giving them the benefit of the doubt. Instead of acting like a hothead, approaching your problems rationally and prioritizing effective communication can help you rebuild trust more easily.
Don’t go into denial.
You cannot begin the process of rebuilding trust in your relationship if you don’t admit that you have a problem in the first place. Constant denial or avoiding the issue will just make the situation more complicated. You have to be confident enough to deal with all uncomfortable situations head-on.
Don’t take your partner for granted.
If you don’t consider rebuilding trust to be an important step in your relationship, it’s probably because you take your partner for granted. If you don’t feel grateful for the wonderful relationship you’ve been blessed with, it’s obvious that you will be reluctant to make any effort to improve it.
Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable.
If you want your partner to trust you, you have to show them that you are not afraid to let your guard down. Embrace vulnerability as a beautiful part of a relationship, and feel free to express yourself genuinely. When you do so, they, too, feel comfortable doing the same.
Face tough situations together.
Being in a relationship involves many risks and uncomfortable situations. Whenever you face a tough phase in your relationship, fight as a team. You know that you can always rely on your partner during tough times. This benefits your understanding because it helps you rebuild trust in your relationship efficiently.
There are no fixed rules regarding rebuilding trust in a relationship. Different things work for different people because it depends a lot on their personalities, commitment to the relationship, or the scenario in which they stand. These are some common things that can make things a little better for you.
Probable reasons why your relationship is not working out:
- You and your partner have severe trust issues.
- You have different expectations from each other in the relationship.
- Your perception of life is different, and you don’t move at the same pace.
- You are emotionally incompatible with your partner.
- You don’t have effective communication in this relationship.
- Your partner is a complete egoist and narcissist.
- Your partner abuses you physically or emotionally.
- Your partner is extremely disorganized and imbalanced in life.
- You have eventually grown apart from each other and are now bored with this relationship.
- You can’t deal with finances efficiently.
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Hey! I’m Chris Woods . I’m a 38-Year-Old Personal Trainer Who Enjoys Eating Out, Watching Television, and Worshiping. I Have a Degree in Psychology. I’m Physical in Pretty Good Shape. My Average Height with Glowing Skin, Black Hair, and Light Grey Eyes. I Love to Write About Love & Relationships. So, That’s Why I Created This Blog to Share My Knowledge with You.