Everyone wants to find someone they can love and depend on for the rest of their life. Some manage to find their dream partner, while some fail and end up in a bad relationship.
After some time, they find that their partner is simply using them for some reason.
Signs You Are Being Used in A Relationship
Being used by a partner can be a painful feeling that no one would ever want to go through in their life.
However, finding out that your partner is using you can be tricky. But if you look for sure signs, then you can find out whether your partner is abusing you or not.
They always want something from you.
One of the obvious signs that you can look for is that your partner will always ask something from you all the time. It can be anything like money, some product, or anything. If you keep giving them what they need, they will be nice to you.
But once you stop giving them, you can see some change in their behavior as they always become rude and angry. It is a clear sign that your partner is simply using you and will only stay with you as long as you keep giving them what they need.
To catch your partner red-handed, you can refuse to give something that your partner needs. Then you must wait for their reaction and how they react to the situation. This way, you can easily find out whether your partner is using you or not.
They always talk about themselves.
There are a lot of people in this world who want someone to talk to and keep talking about themselves. If your partner falls under this category, then it is a sign that you are being used.
Whenever you two have a conversation, you will notice that your partner will start talking about him/her no matter the topic.
It may be mainly because they need someone to talk to; you are the perfect candidate. Your partner may not do this on purpose and may just be a need to which they are reacting.
Whatever the reason, you need to be careful in such relationships as there is no true love that you seek.
You are the one who is paying all the time.
As a couple, you two may spend a lot of time together and visit places like a restaurant, hotel, park, or any area.
You need to pay a certain fee to have fun in such places. Now you may be comfortable spending the money and focusing on having fun.
But to confirm, you should ask your partner once or twice to make the payment. If he/she refuses, then you need to be careful.
Your partner may be dating you only because you are the one spending money and paying for everything.
You always come to their rescue.
In a relationship, you will always be there for your partner, no matter how bad a situation. You will always protect them no matter what. But some people may use it to their advantage.
If you are constantly bailing your partner out, then beware that it could be a sign of them using you.
Your partner may just need someone who will rescue them whenever they need help. Such relationships don’t last much longer, and it is better to end such relationships.
You are forced to say YES every time.
Whenever your partner demands something from you, you face difficulty saying NO. It can be because you are afraid to say no or simply because you have no other option.
Either way, it indicates your partner is using you. If your partner truly cares about you, then you must have the freedom to decide whether to say YES or NO.
You must have equal power to make a decision.
They take you for granted.
If your partner is always asking for something from you, it can signify you are being used. Some people take others for granted and make them do whatever they want. If your partner also behaves like that, then you are being used by them.
Your partner doesn’t like to hear a NO and always asks you to do something. In such cases, the best option is to end your relationship and move on.
If you stay in such a relationship, you will continue to be used by your partner whenever they need something.
They never say thank you.
Whenever your partner is in trouble or needs something, you are always there for them. You are always there to support your partner, no matter how bad the situation is.
However, despite working so hard to support your partner, you never get a thank you as a reply.
It is not compulsory in a relationship. However, it is also a sign that your partner doesn’t care about you and just wants to get his benefits. It can be why your partner doesn’t bother to thank you for your efforts.
They ignore your often.
A relationship is all about the love and cares you two have for each other. So whenever you are free, you call your partner or meet them directly to have some fun.
However, your partner may ignore you and your calls and come up with some excuse.
If this keeps happening for some time, then it is an indication that your partner is ignoring you. In such cases, you should take a break from your relationship to see how things are going. There is no point in staying in a relationship where you are not given respect or time.
What to do if your partner is using you?
Once you find out that your partner was using you, it will surely break your heart. After spending so much time with your partner, you never realized you were being used.
You loved them as much as you could, and in the end, you didn’t get the same back from them.
It can be a harrowing experience, and you may take a lot of time to get over being used. If you want to get over being used by your partner, then you should follow these tips:
Take your time
There is no quick way to fix this; you need to take as much as you need to fix your broken heart. In the beginning, you may have trouble sleeping and will feel sad, angry, and hurt. Don’t try to suppress these feelings and let them flow.
Take out all your emotions and focus on positivity. As you keep doing this, you will get over being used and start living out normally.
Know that there is a specific time that you need to take to recover. It all depends on you and how strong your willpower is.
Stop all communications with the person who used to
Some people still stay in touch with their partners even after realizing they are being used. If this is the case for you, you must stop all communications with your partner.
If you want to recover truly, you need to cut all your communications with your partner.
This will help you focus on other things in life, and you will be able to recover quickly. But if you still stay in touch, you can end up more hurt than before.
Spend time with family and friends
The best way to keep yourself busy is to spend your day with family and friends. They will keep you engaged all day which will help you divert your mind from your partner.
You can also share your situation with them to get all the help you can get.
They will surely help you feel better and boost your daily morale. You can always depend on your family and friends as they genuinely care for you and will help you recover from the pain.
Get busy in life
One of the best ways to stop thinking about your past is to get busy in life. If you do various activities all day, you won’t have any time to think about the past.
This way, you can focus on your future and move on with your life.
You can get busy with a job, read books, watch movies, or anything else. Whatever you do, just ensure you are keeping yourself engaged and your emotions in check. If you practice self-care daily, you can overcome the past and move on.
Stop blaming yourself
Once you discover that your partner was using you, you may start blaming yourself for not finding this out sooner. You will start hating yourself and won’t even be able to look at your face.
You must avoid such situations at all costs as they can negatively impact your life.
You need to understand that you could never have been able to find out that your partner was using you. After all, you were totally in love and trusted your partner. But there is no point in digging into the past; you should focus on what’s ahead.
Think about your future
Just because your partner was using you doesn’t mean the end of the world. The world is very big, and such things happen all the time.
You must be grateful that you came to know about this sooner.
Now you should focus on moving on with life and starting a new journey. You can still do many things in life other than just feeling sad about whatever happened. So, keep your past behind and look at what’s awaiting you in the future.
Start dating again
To move on, you can try dating again as it will help you forget your past and focus on your future. This step is optional; if you are not yet comfortable with dating again, you should not try this.
But if you want to leave behind your past, you should consider this option and start dating.
If you are lucky, you may find the type of partner whom you always dreamt of. So, you need to stop clinging to the past and look beyond. It will surely help you heal and get better.
After realizing that you were being used, you should not lower your morale and confidence. You should never think it is all your fault and should have found out earlier.
There is no point in thinking about all these now as it won’t change anything.
Instead, you need to have a positive attitude and be ready to face the world again. You must be confident that you will never be used again by anyone and stay positive.
Remember that not everyone wants to use, and some genuinely care about you.
Get professional help
If you are facing a lot of difficulties trying to get over being used by your partner, then you should consider seeking the help of a professional.
You can consult a professional who will help you get over the pain and also help you with the trauma.
The consultant will provide you with some of the best techniques that you can use to move on and get rid of all the negativity. You can also go to therapy which will surely help you physically and mentally.
Just make sure you don’t hold yourself back and give your best.
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships