At some point in life, you may want to distance yourself from someone for some reason. Detachment isn’t an easy process especially if you were close to that person. It is a painful process and can use all the patience you have in the process.
Imagine being friends with someone for a very long time and then suddenly you distance yourself from that person. It’s very hard and painful for both.
With the right steps and some patience, you can detach yourself from someone over time.
Why you should detach someone from your life?
You may have your reason for distancing yourself from a person close to you. It is not easy but is necessary for you to move on. However, doing so will put an immense toll on you both physically as well as mentally.
Thus, you should prepare yourself for the process. But sometimes you may be not sure as to whether or not you should detach yourself from someone.
Here are some reasons why you should distance yourself from someone:
You like being alone
If you are those type of people who like being alone, distancing yourself from people would seem like a good choice. You enjoy your own company and don’t like others invading your personal space. Instead of telling them to stay away all the time, the best choice would be to distance themselves.
You can tell them directly that you don’t want their company anymore and want to left alone. This works all the time and is the fastest way to distance yourself. The fewer people you have in your circle, the more comfortable you will feel.
You don’t like being judged all the time
There may be times when you get judged by people around you. It can be irritating as they try to tell you what is wrong and what is right. Being judged is one of the most frustrating feelings and can get into your head.
In some cases, you may even end up in a fight with them. The best way to avoid all these is by simply distancing yourself from them. This way you will no longer have to listen to their judgmental views and you can feel free again.
You want to have some mental peace
Sometimes, you may just want to be left alone so that you can have some mental peace. Being surrounded by people around you all the time can make you crazy. You have to listen to them, their judgments or views all the time.
But you too may have some problems in your life that you are dealing with. Listening to them on top of that can drive you mad. Thus, the best solution would be to distance yourself from them. This way you can have mental peace and you can focus more on yourself.
They are toxic
Not everyone has the same view as you. Some people are toxic and that’s the way they are. Being around them makes you uncomfortable and can drive you mad. Such people don’t have any self-respect and have a bad influence on you as well.
Thus, the best choice would be to distance yourself from them. This way you won’t have to listen to them and their toxic views. The sooner you detach them from your life the better. Such people can affect your life.
You will be less vulnerable
You may be the type of person who feels vulnerable when around people. Whenever you are around them, you feel threatened and attacked. If you have this feeling when around them, then you should consider distancing yourself from them.
This way you will no longer feel vulnerable and will feel safe. You don’t have to fear that someone will know your secrets or someone invading your personal space. Distancing someone from yourself is the best solution.
You don’t like the way they treat you
Some people ignore the fact that their words can hurt you. Some people do it on purpose to hurt you when you are around them. It can be annoying and frustrating and can even lead to fights.
The best possible solution in such situations is to distance yourself from such types of people. It may take some time, but is worth it. Staying away from such people will also help in increasing your morale and self-respect.
The person is just using you
There may be some people in your life who are with you just to get some benefit out of it. They don’t care about you and have no interest in your life. All they care about is getting what they want, even if it ends up hurting you. If you are close with any such person, then it can hurt when you find their true nature.
If you find that someone is using you for their gain, you should distance yourself from them. It will help you stay safe and keep you away from being misused by them. It will hurt at first but is worth the effort.
How to distance yourself from someone?
Once you have made your mind to distance yourself from someone, all you need to is follow the below-given steps and let the process flow. It will require you to have patience and be as gentle as possible during the process.
Here are the top steps that you can use to distance yourself from someone:
Figure out why you want to distance yourself from someone
Before you choose to distance yourself from someone, the first thing you must do is figure you exactly why you want to detach them from your life. It can be any reason and it will help you confront them directly.
Once you get a reason, you can explain to them why you want to distance yourself from them. It’s better than completely ignoring them and keeping them in the dark. Confronting them with your reason is the best choice as this way you can have a decent departure. A good reason will help you emotionally to detach yourself from them.
Express your feelings to the person directly
After finding a good reason for you to distance yourself from your someone, the next thing you need to do is confront them directly. Talk to them and tell them why you want it. Take it slow and explain everything in detail as much as possible.
It will help them understand your reason. Even if they do not understand, it is okay as you won’t have to live with the guilt that you are ignoring someone who doesn’t even know why. No matter whatever reason you have, just talk to them and share your opinion with them.
Take it slow and don’t rush it
When confronting them with your reason for distancing yourself from them, you need to take it slow. You don’t just go to them and tell them “We can’t talk anymore.” It will end things on a bad note and you will feel guilty later. Instead, you need to take it slow and explain why you choose to take such a decision.
Whatever reason you have, just make sure to talk to them calmly and let them understand you. If you rush things, they may not end up as expected and can even worsen things. You can start little by little and explain your point of view.
Stop all communication with the person completely
After talking to the person and telling them that you want to detach yourself from them, you need to stop all communication with them. You will have to create some space between you and them to make it less painful. Cut all the communication with them as if you don’t know them.
Remove them from your social media accounts, remove their number and stop seeing them. Even if the person tries to contact you after you told them that you want to detach from them, you can ignore them completely. If you don’t, it will get very hard and painful for you to detach yourself from them.
Get busy to keep yourself preoccupied
Even after distancing yourself from someone, you may still think of that person all the time. There is no point in thinking about them and will only cause more pain. To ease the pain, you can shift your focus to work and keep yourself busy as much as possible.
Do whatever you can to keep yourself busy so that you don’t have the time to think about them. By doing so for some time, you will eventually start forgetting about them and move forward in your life.
Don’t take any shortcut during the process
Detaching yourself from someone doesn’t happen overnight. It takes time and a lot of patience to completely distance yourself from someone. It is a long journey and you must prepare yourself for it. Don’t look for shortcuts as there are none.
Detachment is far more difficult and painful than attachment. At first, you may hold on to some memories while will be painful. But as time goes by, all those memories will fade away and the pain will subside over time.
There is no going back. Keep moving.
Distancing yourself from someone is a very long process and can take weeks, months, and even years if the person was close to you. As time flows, you will learn to live without them in your life and you will eventually forget about them. You need to focus on moving forward and never look back and think of all the time you spent with them.
After you detach yourself from someone, there is no going back. Even if you want things to return to normal, they won’t happen and will give you more pain. Over time, you will learn to live without them and do things that make you happy.
Take time to heal yourself
There is a popular saying, “Time heals everything.” This holds for this situation as well. After you detach yourself from someone, it will be very painful at first. Even after months, you may still miss them in your life and want them to return. However, doing so will harm than good.
Instead, you need to focus on yourself and let time flow. As time passes, all your pain will be healed and you will find a way to stay happy in your life. There is no shortcut in detaching yourself from someone and is a time-consuming process. It’s the truth and there are no easy steps that you can go for.
Surround yourself with friends and family to forget
After you detach yourself from someone, you may still remember them and think about them. You may still have emotions for them and may even feel bad for them to be in such a situation. So you can surround yourself with your friends and family who will support you and help you move forward in life.
Talk with your family and spend your time with your friends as it will help you emotionally and get support from them. By spending time with them, you will see that there are still so many people around you who love you and care for you.
Think of your future without the person in it
Since you will no longer be in touch with them after you detach yourself from them, you need to start thinking of your future without them. You need to stop thinking of your past and move forward in life. If you think of all the amazing memories you had with them, you won’t be able to focus on your future and will stay sad for the rest of your life.
Thus focus on all the things that you can do in life without them in it. It will help you see the world differently and you will find happiness again in life. You can start by thinking about what you want to do in your life, create a bucket list and enjoy every moment.