You might be one of those sensitive and romantic guys who has a hard time trying not to fall for every girl that he sees.
While this is as innocent as it seems, it can make you land in some dark mental spaces before you know it. Here are some ways that you can take a firm stand and take care of your tiny little innocent heart.
tips to avoid falling in love with every girl
Know yourself. You need to know yourself more and also understand your needs. You need to know what vacuum you are trying to fill with the help of dating someone. Once you fix yourself, you won’t search for external help.
Boundaries should be strong. When being friends with a girl, try and set some firm boundaries. This also includes not acting as a shoulder that they can cry on. Don’t be the nice guy. Get your hopes high and be the one losing out on love.
Spend time with friends. Have some male friends who will work as your support system and make you stand up for yourself as a man. You need some friends in life to rely on. And if they are guys, then there is nothing to beat it.
Have a life. Have your own life. Believe in yourself and have your own passions. Don’t be the guy who has his happiness on the stakes of other people’s happiness. Have your priorities been fulfilled? You will automatically feel great when you chase and accomplish your own goals.
Do not change yourself. Do not try and change yourself for who you are not. Accept that you have a pure and innocent heart, and that makes you fall in love so easily. Accept yourself the way you are.
Talk to her openly. When you have feelings for some girl, don’t hide them. Be bold and overcome the fear of rejection. Also, this way you will know where you stand with the girl and whether or not you have a future.
Do not overdo things. Never do anything just out of your will to do nice things. People will have the edge over you and take you for granted. The world outside is not that great, and the earlier you accept it, the safer you will be.
Understand your needs. When alone, know what you need. Know what you expect from yourself and also your partner. Ensure that you have realistic expectations and this is the first step to becoming mature in relationships.
Know what love means to you. If you believe in Disney movie love, then get it out of your head. Real love in the modern-day age requires some serious work and is a lot more practical than roses and daisies.
Think about the future. When you start liking the girl, think about the future. Understand if you two are actually comfortable. Do a real and thorough analysis of how you, too, would be in a relationship. Then take a big step.
Set your priorities. When with a girl, set your priorities. Know what you want from life and go after it. You are a man at the end of the day and should be independent enough to give yourself all the happiness you deserve.
Spend some me-time. When alone, spend some time on your own. If you can’t love yourself or be with yourself, then how can you expect someone else to be there, either? Know yourself more.
Create space. Keep some distance when being friends with a girl. This will allow you to understand how much familiarity you can breed between the two of you. The more space, the more freedom.
Take your time. Take your time when you start to like someone. You need to understand whether this is the girl that you truly love and if she is worth your time and emotions.
Take the help of a therapist. You can go for counseling sessions with a mentalist. They can help you understand the patterns you need to break more scientifically. Sometimes you can’t fight all your battles alone.
Differentiate between heart and mind. Often time you will find yourself liking someone just for the sake of your mind. You might be attracted to some specific features and this might make you think that you have feelings for this girl even if you don’t.
Stay honest with yourself. Be honest when starting to like a girl. Don’t try to lose focus. This will cause you to fixate more on the girl, and this is something that you should completely avoid.
Go out for a family dinner. Spend more time with family. Once you feel that other people love you for who you are, you will be able to fill up that love void in your life.
Notice the red signals. Pay attention to detail. When starting to like someone, you need to know if you can bear with their shortcomings too. Otherwise, even if you start dating the girl, you two will soon break up and get into fights.
Hold your emotions tight. Keep your emotions away when you meet a girl. Don’t think that you are in love just because she has nice eyes or a warm smile. Go beyond and get to them better first before making a decision.
Do not be in a hurry. Do not be in a hurry to kickstart a relationship. All the best relationships start slow, and they gradually nurture into firm relationships with a modest foundation.
Stop waiting for her messages. If you are waiting for her messages, it seems like you are fixating too much on this particular girl and you are raising the stakes of your happiness according to her actions. Do you understand how stupid it is?
Evaluate at first. When you meet a girl, evaluate her. Know more about her and also analyze how they would prove as a person. You wouldn’t want to be that guy that goes after girls just for the sake of looks or a perfect figure line.
Say no to her plans. It’s a great way to start by saying no to a girl sometimes. Once you start doing this, you have more control and dominance in the dynamic. This will also make her know that you are scarce. Thus, this will also increase your value as a man.
Avoid her. Sometimes avoiding the girl you like will make her like you more. Also on the reverse side, it can bring down all that you have been feeling for this girl so far. It could also be beneficial as you two will have some distance.
Reject romantic gestures. Don’t give in to casual flirtation and think that a girl is all into you. Science has proven that a lot of guys take a woman’s nice gestures to be signs of romantic interest. Be sure of the obvious signs. Stop assuming.
Make a list. Make a list of things that you expect from a girl. Only take your chances if a particular girl closes on the majority of the important points. This way you will be able to judge who is for you and who isn’t.
Find reasons to be incompatible. If you like someone too much and you want to take a step back, know why you two won’t be comfortable together. Things that repel you away from this girl will make you focus more on the negatives and your feelings will soon subside.
Make her your friend. It’s a great way to start healthy relationships with girls. If you know how to be a true friend, you will soon know how to be the perfect partner. Also, having some great friends will help you understand women better and more about their psyche.
Get involved in your hobby. Be passionate about the things that excite you. Have a hobby that you are dying to master. It could be playing an instrument or being good at a sport or anything similar. Just have passion for what you do.
Confide to your close friend. If you feel that you are crossing the line, confide in a close friend. They might be able to help you stop your feelings and pull you away just when you start to waver.
Tell her about your emotions. Learn to be bold and man up. Learn how to approach and go after the things you want in life. This itself is a very attractive quality in a man. So just go up and talk to the girl. You will have a better picture.
Have control of your desire. Being a man needs you to take responsibility for your actions. If you do not have control over your actions or your mind, it shows that you can’t take care of yourself.
Stop worrying. Stop feeling worried and contemplate about everything a bit too much. You need to do the right things and leave out the rest. If you feel that you will be alone all your life, rest assured that someone somewhere is made for you and will love you for who you are.
Do not think about her. Stop thinking about girls and love all the time. If you can’t seem to stop thinking about someone, maximum chances are that you are suffering from an obsession. This isn’t quite healthy.
Plan a trip with friends. If you feel too occupied by the thought of some girl, take some time off from your everyday life and go out on a trip with your friends. This will have a healing effect on you and you will feel a lot fresher.
See her flaws first. You need to first see her flaws before making a move. Unless you know the ways that she could be toxic in your life, you won’t know how much of a difference it will make to have her in your life as your partner.
Check if she is the one. There isn’t quite someone who is just the perfect one for you but there is always one person who will feel right no matter what. You need to read the cues that say that she is the one for you and taking the risk will be worth it.
Check your online activity. Do not stalk up every other girl on the internet and get your hopes high. Also, limiting social networks will bring down your need to be in a relationship when you see everyone else dating someone.
Avoid physical contact. Physical contact tends to make the heart grow a little fonder. We as humans are very responsive and sensitive to touch. Avoid getting too close and personal with girls if you feel that it affects your emotions.
Do not lower your standards. When you think too much about love, you become desperate to find love, and while in the process you feel like you can be with any other girl out there. This is quite a problem because you might lower your standards.
Do not become a stalker. When you become desperate, you might get too obsessed and girls may feel stalked and suffocated. This is not a good sign as your social image goes down. No matter what, don’t do things that will negatively affect your life.
Shift your focus to another person. If you seem to get too obsessed with someone, keep shifting focus. Moreover, get to know girls as friends first. Having friends of the opposite gender is essential and mostly very healthy.
Do not take their attention. Resist being all drooly over a girl’s attention. If you feel that you can break easily when getting too much attention from a girl, try to take a step back and resist any kind of contact.
Maintain your respect. You need to know how to command respect when around other people. If you give yourself away too easily, chances are that people will not respect your self-esteem and you will lose value.
Convince your mind. You need to first convince and gain complete control over your mind. You need to figure out a way to stop your mind from leading you on with unobvious and misleading cues.
Go for a break. Take a break and do something that truly makes you happy. It could be anything. If you have wanted to go for an adventure sport all your life, this could be a perfect opportunity to do so.
Clearly say no. When you feel that girl is playing around or trying to lead you on just to get some attention, man up and reject her effectively on the face. This way, you will at least have your ego satisfied and you won’t have to rely on people liking you or not.
Focus on your career. Relationships are often seen to take a toll on a person’s career. If this is you, you need to know that an ambitious man is an attractive man. Chances are when you will go out chasing your dreams, girls will come chasing you. You automatically become a high-value man.
Go out with her. You can just go out with a girl to hang out just as friends. This will help you know her as a friend and also break the monotony of your heart’s desire to date her and get involved in a romantic dynamic.
Stop rushing. Stop rushing and jumping into relationships. You need to research about this girl you are feeling so strongly for. Is it just because of some things that have attracted you to them? You need to understand why you like her so much and work on the process.
Learn from your past mistakes. Learn from your past bad encounters with most girls. If you have a past record of getting friendzoned and being played with, do not do the same things. Learn to understand cues that clearly state a red flag and take a step back.
Try to avoid gifts. Do not take or give gifts. This creates a kind of indebtedness towards each other. And while they may see this as friendly, you might be misinterpreting things and getting your hopes high for no reason.
Have patience. Be patient while getting involved with a girl. Good things take time and you need to work on the relationship every day. Also, if you feel that you are losing out by not having a girlfriend, you need to realize that you will find someone who will be worth it.
Do not get greedy. Do not be obsessed with getting a girlfriend. You are sure to jinx the situation if you are too needy and desperate. Chances are you will make the wrong choice and get heartbroken.
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships