The worst categories of people to be around are the egoistic, self-centered ones. Individualistic know-it-all people are harmful to any relationship and need to change themselves.
Since selfish people do not realize what they are doing wrong, here are some tips to understand.
How to Stop Being Self-Centered in A Relationship
1. Internalize that truth. They need to first admit their flaws and accept the upcoming dangers these loopholes can bring in a relationship. Stop being in denial and try to improve.
2. Think about your partner’s feelings. Be considerate of how the partner feels. One should judge the outcomes before doing certain things for themselves. Their deeds must not affect their partners.
3. Give the partner the chance to express. Both should have the freedom to speak. Listen to your partner when he/she blurts it out. Do not tell them to shut up when the person is feeling low.
4. Stop thinking that you are always the correct one. This kind of self-deception may wreak havoc in the relationship. Do not impose your opinions or principles and respect the partner’s decisions to come to a joint conclusion.
5. Be open–minded. Practice recognizing your faults. Listen to others and make sure you are not being egoistic. Learn to check on the reasoning and change if you are proven wrong.
6. Practise putting your partner first. Change the habit of only thinking about your own benefits. Ask your partner before jumping to conclusions. Instead of demanding help, ask for it.
7. Stop talking about “me” and I. always talking about you is a sign of self-centeredness. Ponder on this and start by thinking of you two as a team and not as individual identities. Do not be selfish.
8. Be humble. A selfless person is always humble and stays down to earth. Be willing to admit your faults and learn to apologize. Do not belittle others and stay modest. Saying sorry can make a big difference.
9. Be generous. Avoid being stingy with every small thing. Time, affection, and other resources are crucial for creating a strong bond.
10. Ask for your partner’s advice before deciding anything. If the couple is committed, both of them deserve to know each other’s plans. Ask their thoughts and do not neglect their values in life.
11. Stop being over-possessive. Behaving like a maniac is a sign of selfishness. Be sure of your partner’s love and do not prohibit him/her from talking to the opposite gender and hanging out with his/her friends.
12. Give your partner space to grow. Be selfless enough to allow him/her to excel in life. When the partner will explore different avenues and try new opportunities he/she will be happy. Do not add to the burden and demand time and attention.
13. Avoid being demanding. Both of your worlds are different. Be more understanding whenever the significant other is busy. Be aware of his/ her responsibilities and act maturely. Be selfless.
14. Be willing to sacrifice at times. Truly loving your partner will naturally mean you will sacrifice as and when needed. Walk an extra mile for the person you care for while you go out of your comfort zone and be selfless.
15. Learn to compromise. A self-centered person will always go by his/her beliefs. If you are guilty of something, open yourself to adjustments and resolve issues. These changes will make the relationship harmonious.
16. Stop feeling entitled. Do not think of your partner as a lower person under any circumstances. However successful you become, do not expect him/her to serve you all the time. Equality is the first criteria to earn love and respect in a relationship.
17. Remember the golden rule. Do not do what you do not want to be done to you. Do not be selfish and treat your partner badly. Treat then how you would like to be treated. This will make everything simple.
18. Reach out when needed. The partner might not make the first move every time. Stop expecting this and be willing to take the first step. Whenever the relationship starts feeling cold, you can try to bring back the sweetness and give some effort.
19. Be conscious of your actions. If a person knows that he/she has certain selfish tendencies, then the person must start to be conscious and try to overcome them. Think before you speak and self-evaluate to calculate the improvements.
20. Be more God-centered. Strengthen the devotion towards God. Decide to serve him and please him with your actions. Humility is the main character here, and the character development will help you to be selfless and less egoistic.
21. Think less of yourself. Self-love is good but too much can create problems. Think about your near and dear ones and put others before yourself. Act wisely and counter-question your selfish deeds.
22. Start paying attention to how people respond to you. Take some time to stop focusing on yourself and start noticing how other people respond. You will be able to predict certain emotions through this non-verbal communication and this will really be helpful for your relationship. Participation is a good sign here.
23. Put yourself in your significant other’s shoes. Think before responding abruptly.do not hijack the conversation and go with the flow. Sound pleasant and let the person realize that he/she is being heard.
24. Remember that people have their own lives too. They have their own ups and downs and it is okay when they do not have time for you every day. Do not hold grudges against them and walk away. Stay and understand the situation.
25. Get to know the people around you. Be friendly. Being arrogant and rude is a huge turn-off. Know their stories and not just see them regularly just like that. Initiate conversations with the people who help you live a certain way.
26. Be proud, but do not brag. There is nothing wrong with being proud but no one likes a show-off. Be modest even while publicizing your success stories. Do not boast about your achievements.
27. Do something nice for everyone you care about. Do some good deeds without expecting anything in return. There might not be anything extravagant but the gesture will remind them of you and your selfishness will be destroyed.
28. Get involved in volunteering activities. Volunteering will help you realize that there are many more important things happening in the world. Only donating will not suffice. The main thing lies in the time and effort one actually spends doing charity.
29. Let your close ones know what you are doing. Inform your partner about your journey. He/she can support you in need or promptly help you when you might have the chance to fail.
30. You can vent, but your partner might not be able to do that. If it happens that the partner always listens to your rants and complains but you could not offer the same comfort zone, the relationship will surely degrade. This is a sign that you are being selfish.
31. You block your partner out. Everyone likes to avoid deep, scary conversations. Ensuring a proper conversation is very much important. Locking yourself up is a very selfish and confusing act.
32. You are a troublemaker. You cannot insist that your perspective is correct every time. This is a warning sign of selfishness in a relationship. Do not try to prove your point every single time.
33. Too eager to end things. Words once said will always have an impact. Threatening someone to end things whenever possible will instigate hatred between the couple. Fight as a single unit against the problem.
34. Understand yourself. Figure out your inner feelings. Understand why things are not going smoothly. Find the root, share the problem, heal, and move on towards a healthy relationship.
35. Let them speak and never interrupt. The constant tantrums and screaming might affect your partner and he/she may never again speak up. If they get loud, politely communicate and listen to them.
36. Remember the happy times. Do not just focus on the miserable stuff. Relive the initial days and recollect the happy memories when you guys have seen each other grow and be happy.
37. Set yourself certain boundaries. There is always a fine line between nagging and wanting attention. Your selfish behavior may be beyond toleration so it is better not to push or overdo it.
38. Do not be too hard on yourself. Do not hate your behavior but realize your mistakes and keep a positive attitude while correcting them.
39. A positive space is very much needed. Turning away is bad and selfish but wanting some personal space is welcome. It is healthy for any relationship and can lighten up the mood too.
40. Reconnect with friends. a relationship damages friendships. Ask your partner to invite friends or go to spend some time with them. This eases up the relationship.
41. Accept people, as they are. Accept people with their flaws, as a whole. Their nature and personalities might not match with you, but you cannot compare them and tell them to change.
42. Think about how you would accept this behavior. Judge the behavior honestly and ask yourself questions. if you consider the version approachable, it is okay. Or else try to be socially better.
43. Step out of the bubble. Learning to reduce selfishness is not possible. Practice the guidelines you studied. Give yourself time and allow mistakes. Build a sympathizing attitude and heal.
44. Finding a balance in a relationship is very important. Neither person should continuously give or take. One person cannot be too demanding. There should always be a balance and that should be decided by the couple itself.
45. Give each other some undivided attention. Let go of every other thing, even for a very short span of time. Listen to each other, eat your favorite dessert, or just cuddle up. This releases stress and increases happiness.
46. Giving should not be equal to martyrdom. Your partner cannot know everything you want. They can understand your choices but that still does not suffice. Communicate so that it does not lead to disappointments. Too much selflessness s actually quite selfish because of some impossible expectations.
47. Put your needs last. This just ensures a smooth functioning and a healthy and lovable relationship. Do not waste energy making a point to just sound correct. Enjoy life as it comes.
48. Do not get caught up in the past. If you have acted selfishly before, it does not make you a bad person. Change yourself and move on. You have to leave your past behind.
49. Get off your high horse. Nobody in this world has more importance. Everybody is striving for excellence and they all are passionate and talented in their own way.do not belittle others just to gain some upper hand.
50. See if you are checking on yourself constantly. This means you have some past trauma stuck up your head. You are either trying too hard to not be selfish or are very much proud and trying to make others listen to you.
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“Compassion, understanding, and connection” – these three words describe me the best. I founded “TheLoveBoy” to share joy of Love. As a self-taught practitioner, I have been studying the dynamics of human connection for the past decade and my passion lies in sharing my insights with others. My mission is to help individuals cultivate deeper and more meaningful relationships