Being gentle not only benefits our own health but also our relationships. We gain more from it.
A gentle and kind spirit is always appreciated and it saves us from unnecessary guilt and pain. Staying kind in this harsh world will allow us to be satisfied and happy.
Here are Tips to Be Gentle in a Relationship
1. Smile often. A genuine and hearty laugh can make anyone comfortable. If the relationship is going through a bad phase, and you want to lighten up the atmosphere, smile. The partner will feel happy to be around.
2. Do not impose your will. One can make suggestions but can never force his/her, partner, to follow that. Everyone has free will and we all should respect that. Discussions are important, but imposing ideas is not.
3. Listen willingly. When the significant other is pouring out sentiments, one should not tell them to stop. Show your eagerness to listen and give a patient ear to it. They rant because they need to.
4. Be polite. Being polite and sober are characteristics of gentleness. If we are mindful about how we behave and avoid being rude, we can make our partner feel comfortable and honor them.
5. Avoid being impatient. Impatience can result in temperamental problems. Try to be more understanding and listen to them. Divert the attention when you are furious.
6. Help or assist whenever it is possible. Offering help is a show of being gentle. Small gestures and cute acts like volunteering can bring a big impact on the relationship.
7. Serve cheerfully. Serve the partner with kindness. Cook his/her favorite dish, make something or simply be happy. It is heart-warming to see a partner happy and content in a relationship.
8. Choose your words carefully. A gentle person does not use aggressive words. When we are arguing over something, it is better to be sensitive and understanding and not shout.
9. Give constructive criticism. We may get impatient with our partners, but we should not blurt it out or use abusive. Learn to turn comments into constructive criticisms. Do not point fingers at one’s mistakes.
10. Use the sandwich principle. This may be effective in pointing out the partner’s mistakes. This principle involves stating the negative comment somewhere between two or more positive comments. This is a sweet yet effective way.
11. Do not raise your voice. Controlling the pitch and volume of our voice is very important. No matter how angry we are, we must maintain a conversational tone while talking and not yell at our partner.
12. Be quiet or walk away. If we cannot control our anger, it is best to give us some time alone. We can choose to be silent or walk away from the scene for the time being. Once we have cooled down, we can solve it.
13. Say “thank you “often. Be more appreciative of the significant other. Thank them generously. This can be a good habit and can strengthen the relationship.
14. Say “please” while asking for a favor. When we need our partner’s help, we must say please. One should never boss around and demand help. Acknowledge their freedom to help or not and appreciate the effort.
15. Be willing to say “sorry. If we are guilty of what we have done, we should apologize. If that hurts our partner, we should be humble enough. This shows how much we love and care for our better halves.
16. Forgive and forget. If you are hurt, forgive without hesitation. One must not stay angry and give up. Do not tolerate the wrong action but forgive once you realize the person is repenting. Let love win.
17. Resist overfamiliarity. Avoid being too much familiar with the partner. It makes one less conscious of his/her own behavior. This results in doing certain things in the wrong way.
18. Be thoughtful. One can be gentle by being thoughtful. One can remember the important dates and prepare some thoughtful surprises for the partner. This will increase the love and intimacy between the couple.
19. Ask for suggestions. Gentle people do not dominate others. They ask for opinions and include their partner in decision-making. Ask them and hear their thoughts for a more clear perspective.
20. Never display force. No matter how angry we get, we must re4sist using force. It is never okay to lose control and hurt oneself physically. Also, any violent acts can leave certain traumas for life.
21. Smile genuinely. This makes the person more comfortable. It creates a happy atmosphere, and the partner feels overjoyed. It builds a happy and healthy relationship over time.
22. Notice how you talk. Major fights escalate because of the tone we use. Avoid speaking in a disrespectful and screaming voice. Even sarcasm is not appreciated as it will not solve anything but lead to major arguments.
23. Be conscious about the wordings. The choice of how you speak can transform a light situation into a troublesome one. Make your partner feel respected. Strictly avoid using harsh, rude, and disrespectful words.
24. Apologize when needed. Do not be stubborn and realize your mistakes. Humbly say sorry and teach them that you care. Make them understand the situation and be unified while solving a common problem.
25. Do not stay angry for long. When you understand that your partner has realized his/her mistakes, it is better to forgive them. Do not act ignorant when they say sorry. The relationship is greater than these petty misunderstandings.
26. Maintain eye contact. Listen carefully to what the other person has to say. Involve in the discussion and look into the eyes. Never interrupt them and see through their eyes what they actually intend.
27. Understand and accept each other. To make the relationship strong yet gentle, both of you need to take initiative. A healthy relationship starts when both of you accept all your flaws. Understand the other person and mold the relationship.
28. Fear of intimacy. Couples fall apart because they do not treat each other properly. Attraction and passion must be rekindled when it is lost. Makeup with a romantic gesture and do not shy away from intimacy.
29. Reignite the fantasy bond. Do not overly connect yourself with your partner. Do not lose your own individual personality and form a false illusion of who you are. But still, involved in your dream activities to bring each other close.
30. Engage in small acts of kindness. Do not do everything consciously. Take small sweet gestures and be kind to one another. Small and gentle acts can make the person fall in love with you every day.
31. Listen to the inner voice. Our minds possess immense influencing power. We should listen to this mental coach and treat our relationship accordingly. This inner voice is very critical and we should abide by rational decisions.
32. Break from your past. One often behaves a particular way because of some past traumas. They may have witnessed a lot and are afraid to experience it in their current relationship. Gently handle these situations.
33. Drop your half of the dynamic. Practice unilateral disarmament. Say something kind, open, and embrace your partner. This helps couples to end arguments and actually find solutions.
34. Do not act out projections. Think and find the source of certain weird behaviors. Do not assume certain things. Do not project your thoughts and presumptions onto your partner based on old experiences.
35. Be mindful of the partner’s wants and feelings. We become distracted and lost and stop thinking about our better halves. We get preoccupied with our own engagements and forget what exactly the partner craves.
36. Do not feel victimized. Do not refuse to slow down. Try and think from the partner’s point of view. Do not forget that the partner is an individual human with different tastes. Learn from your mistakes and rectify them.
37. Show care and concern in a loving way. Treat your partner the way you want to be treated. The idea of an act of love may be different from each other. To learn about what your partner might consider loving and engage in similar activities.
38. Avoid the tit for tat habit. It is easy to get victimized and return that to the person. It does not make you feel good. There is nothing revengeful and nothing that one owes to their partner. Do not make a scorebook of the relationship.
39. Avoid being disrespectful. Only 7% of what we say comes from our heads and the rest comes from how we say it. In order to get our partners to understand our words, we need to be mindful of what we speak and avoid being sarcastic every time.
40. Do not accuse. Do not accuse the partner in spite of telling him what went wrong. The significant other is likely to perceive this as an attack and feel like they are being subjected to unnecessary hate and blame.
41. Find a potential solution. Focus on the problem and not on your feelings. Do not pit against each other but stay strong and unified. Be honest and ask for a solution. Think rationally and in a mature way.
42. Listen with intent. Do not communicate only because you have to. Listen, understand, and act accordingly. To achieve a healthy relationship, we need to understand each other and it takes work and patience.
43. Learn to compromise. Do not punish your partner just because you are angry. Both of the partners may have different opinions but it is not such that they do not deserve our kindness. Agree to let love win and hatred die.
44. Do not emotionally punish the partner. Do not be cold when the partner feels low. Do not protest every time he/she comes up with a new idea. Do not ever think the partner does not deserve kindness.
45. Give them the benefit of doubt. Trust them and give them a chance to explain themselves. Be willing to participate in creating goodwill. Do not feel offended and angry even before hearing them.
46. Let them be aware of your thoughts. They should have knowledge of what is wrong with you. Talk about how you feel, your experiences, and reveal your fears and emotions so that they can take care of you.
47. Pause, take a deep breath, and look inside. Take some time to notice your inner reaction. Honor what your mind says and take a break when needed. Sometimes, things can be overwhelming for the relationship and take a toll on the body.
48. Do not get triggered easily. Take some time to search for the roots of the problem. Being hyper is not the solution. Do not unnecessarily drag a matter and escalate into arguments. Take care of the relationship.
49. Gather information with curiosity. Gather information about the problem and use this as a chance to get to know each other more clearly. You will reach a greater place of understanding.
50. Work as a team. Make a decision as a team and not against each other. Deeply understand where the other person is going wrong. Ask them questions and reach a conclusion.
51. Describe how you feel. Use statements that describe your own experiences and not his/hers. A judgemental tone can break a strong bond and the other person might feel that he/she is being criticized.
52. Body language is important. A strong personality reflects. Couples who identify themselves as strong individuals can fine-tune their relationship even after the strongest blow. A warm yet strong body language with an ability to be soft and gentle is appreciated.
53. Acknowledge the other person’s feelings. Notice how differently your partner responds to different emotional situations. Do not take their feelings for granted. Admire them and tell them that you understand.
54. Cultivate the energy of loving. Communicate to check where you stand. Do not hold grudges and love unconditionally. Spend more time and learn about each other.
55. Take more time with yourself. Learn to love your own self first. When a person will not have any insecurity with his/her own self, he/she can cultivate the feeling of loving another person. Be confident.
56. Spend some quality time together. Once a couple gets time only for themselves, they learn to love each other. Look into the eyes and promise to grow old together. Spend some time away from the cruel world.
57. Be willing to sacrifice at times when it is needed. Truly loving your partner will naturally mean you will sacrifice under certain circumstances. Walk an extra mile for the person you care for while you go out of your comfort zone and be selfless.
58. Remember the happy times. Do not just focus on the bad and miserable parts. Relive the initial days and recollect the happy memories when you guys have seen each other grow and be happy. This will help the couple stay strong.
59. Put your needs last and think of others. This just ensures a smooth functioning and a healthy and lovable relationship. Do not waste energy making a point to just sound correct. Break away from petty issues.
60. Be open–minded and mature. Practice recognizing your faults. Do not be egoistic. Learn to check on the reasoning behind a person’s anger and change if you are proven wrong.
61. Find a balance in a relationship. Neither person should continuously give or take. One person cannot be too demanding and the other cannot be at the receiving end. There should always be a balance decided by them.
62. Do not humiliate each other unnecessarily. Do not just quarrel because you have to.
63. Cuddle and sleep together. Sleeping with your partner increases comfort levels. To increase the understanding skills, an important step is to sleep peacefully.
64. Kiss more. Kissing is not only an act of intimacy but it also reassures safety and security. Feeling loved and valued is important for a healthy relationship.
65. Be honest and open. Hiding things is a big no-no under any circumstances.
66. Get ready for a date night. Treat your relationship like it is new. This is a tried and tested method to revive a dead relationship in a gentle way.
67. Develop and share a hobby. Initiate comforting activities together. This stimulates good vibes in the pastime and you get a chance to engage with the significant other. The boredom is released and communication is improved.
68. Do not try to force a solution. Every person has a different perspective and one should respect that. There should be unity when both the partners continue to get through the dark stages. Teamwork is necessary.
69. Do not look down on each other. Make your partner understand that humiliating or taunting is not the way out. Both should not disrespect or degrade each other. Mutual respect is very important.
70. Love each other. The only thing that can cure everything is love. Conquer all the disbeliefs and disagreements with love.